How do you contribute to your misery?
When you go through situations it is easy to want to blame others for where you are in your life. You want to blame others for your being unhappy. How fair is it to hold someone accountable for your happiness. How is it that you give someone that power and that authority to dictate your state of being? The line between happiness and misery is not that fine. In my opinion happiness to misery does not happen overnight. Misery is a process. Misery comes with time. I will also say it is a bad place to be in to declare misery over your life. Even worse when someone can look at you and see you as miserable. My question to you is how do you contribute to your own misery?
“Misery is defined as a state or feeling of great distress or discomfort of mind or body”. It is an unfortunate place to be in and I think that there are many things that come into play that allows you to get to this level. Keep in mind this is my opinion, most people do not like to discuss their issues, especially in the African American community. Since we do not like to speak on our issues things will build up and stack up to a point of misery overtaking our lives. In some instances takes our lives. When you get to a point of misery, I believe it is natural to want to lash out and want to blame others. Only because it is easier, easier to make it about someone else and put ourselves in a victimized security blank. When we are a victim we can continue to feel sorry for ourselves and being a victim can reel other people into feeling sorry for us too. “Job 11:13-16 If only you would prepare your heart and lift up your hands to him in prayer! Get rid of your sins, and leave all iniquity behind you. Then your face will brighten with innocence. You will be strong and free from fear. You will forget your misery: it will be like water flowing away.”
How do you contribute to your own misery? If for a moment that you eliminated all other people that may have negatively impacted your life, let’s pretend for a moment that they don’t exist, what have you done or what choices do you tend to make that would or could have contributed to your own misery? I am not saying this is all cases, nor am I generalizing people’s problems. This is an opinion and I challenge you to look within yourself to see if there is something you could do differently to help improve your situations. Especially if you have been feeling this way for a long period of time. If you learn to stop counting and keeping track of what people have done to you or are doing to you and focus on why you are allowing them to do it. I think there is a better chance you will come out of the miserable state you are in. Take back the control of your life. Follow no man or person seeking God first! R U SERIOUS!! When you reach this point in your life you have to search for him and give those problems over to him. He will not give you more than you can bear, because he does not expect you to hold the burden alone. When you try to hold the burden yourself it is because you walking in the flesh, you are not equipt to handle this on your own. He wants you to need him, he wants you to remember who is in control when you allow him to lead and you understand you are not greater than he, it all comes together.
This reminds me of the Poem Footprints in the Sand, by Mary Stevenson, part of says, “Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you’d walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why when I need you most you would leave me.” “The Lord replied: “My precious child, I love you and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”
People can only do what you allow them to do. You cannot count on people for your happiness nor can you allow them the control to make you miserable. Happiness comes from self if you are not happy with yourself another person can’t make you happy. People come in and for a moment they can make you forget about what plagues you. Once those people are gone and you are in a room by yourself, you should be able to maintain that same joy. You have to learn to love yourself, you have to learn what you want out of life for yourself, and you have to make it happen. Don’t let seasonal people or things burden you with a lifetime of hurt and misery. Lastly, do not allow you to contribute to your Misery!!
We speak life!!
R U Serious!!!